blogs are all for ranting right
so if that is so, im going to rant today so if you dont want to read just close the window.
if you're a all time reader, i havent rant about my life in such a long while...

lets talk about the much happier things today
accompanied Sunny for a haircut (not me, its him)
then i went to school to revise on Biology

afterthat, im so late to meet my friends (you know who)
so i treated them mac ice cream
so much so it was normal
i told my friend i wanted to check out on topshop later, knowing they heard me
i alway start my day to be optimistic, i tried to be happy as much as i can, be cheerful be smiling.
but i think it all turn the wrong way today
i dont smile much, im quiet and solo
its depressing
when i am hearing my friends chatting and i want to say something, its like interupting them (or so they will ignore me and this happen many times)
when i say something nobody care, when i got haywired in my voice they laugh
when they got something to say, they wont find me (except once or twice terry)
its like im an extra
whether or not im there or not there, its alright
it wont affect anyone
yeah, im the odd one
maybe i shouldnt be in the group
or perhaps im not in it to begin with
i am sad, for throughout the day
i am really sad
even though i smile or laugh once or twice, the sadness and loneliness still engulf me
so we went to arcade, im a little turned off because nobody know i want to go topshop and take a look
i told Sunny, he know, but he forget? perhaps im not an important friend at all
my exsistence is not needed here, maybe i should go away i thought
and i did, to cool myself off
to be alone so awhile
i am sad, i took so much effort to hold back my tears
forcing them in , why should i make ashame and cry in public
why should i cry for just puny little thing like this
i havent cry for such a long time, i maintain it why should i let it off now
so its late
no body know what i want
why i didnt speak up? cause because from what i see, they will definitely be pissed off if i went there and dont buy anything
because i wanted to try other sizes of the skinnies, KangSheng at there scold scold.
just buying the skinnies i can see what will happen if i didnt buy anything
i didnt speak up
so in solitation i walk alone again
always at the back because i wont be notice
i dont want to get reprimanded for disturbing their talks
so i kept slience, what can i do
what i did was wrong

i think im a failure as a human
maybe im so boring
sorry for not able to make myself less boring

and after all that and i reached home
i thought i can still hold it well
but it seem i let it all out while bathing
while im at that, i sort out the problem again
i told myself once again

to be happy for a day, you'll spend the day
to be sad for a day, you'll still spend the day
why not be happy rather then sad

i always had this in mind
as you always see the happy cheerful me
but everyone has their ups and downs
well for me, it happen almost everytime
im a sad boy
truely a sad sad boy.

lets hope that it will be a better and happier tomorrow.
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